floor9.com

In case you’ve had your head under a rock for the past two months, Pennsylvania is about to violate federal labor law by demanding that its employees come to work without pay.  Governor Ed Rendell has stated that employees are exempt from the Fair Labor Standards Act, but the United States Supreme Court has a different opinion on the matter.

Because our union is worthless on the matter — all they’ve done is publish links to unemployment benefits, which don’t help us since we’re still employed — I called the US Department of Labor on the matter.  Since it’s a federal law being broken, why not ask the federal government for assistance?

The woman who answered at the DOL was very helpful.  She helpfully collected some basic information and helpfully referred me to the Pennsylvania Department of Labor & Industry.  She helpfully informed me that the USDOL does not have the authority to enforce labor laws, even at the federal level.  I helpfully thanked her for her time and helpfulness.  Then I helpfully hung up.

Unfortunately, my call to L&I was not nearly as productive.

“Hello, this is (redacted)”

Hi, (redacted), my name is floor9.  I’d like to speak with someone about a concern I have regarding my employer threatening to withhold pay.

“That would be me.  Go ahead.”

Good to hear.  Well, basically, my employer is telling me that starting sometime in July, I’ll be expected to come to work but won’t actually be paid until sometime later this year.  Unfortunately, they’re not sure how long this period will last, nor will they tell me when I should expect my next paycheck.

“Well, you see, that’s not permitted except in a few very specific sets of circumstances.  Did they give you a reason?”

Oh, yes.  Absolutely.  They were very clear about the reason.  It seems that somewhere in the upper echelons of management, someone has hosed up our operating budget.  I’m no accountant so I couldn’t even begin to tell you what’s wrong, but I get the impression that we’re out of money.  Apparently, they know how to fix it, but some of the people don’t like some of the other people, and are apparently refusing to agree on one plan because nobody wants to be seen as “weak”.

“Oh that’s terrible!”

It sure is.  I don’t know exactly what I’m going to tell my creditors if this isn’t resolved, because the impression I’m getting is that we could go several months without pay.

“Well that’s definitely prohibited.  We can start an investigation on your behalf.  What is the name of your employer?”

The Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.

“…Excuse me?”

Pennsylvania.  I’m a state employee.

“…Well … who was this employer you were talking about?”

Pennsylvania.  Surely you’ve heard of this in the news.

“…Well …  I don’t …  I’m not sure that …  You see, that’s different.”

Oh?

“Yeah.”

How so?  I’m pretty sure labor laws apply to government employees just the same as private-sector employees.

“Well yes, technically they do, it’s just …  See, you’re getting into federal law here.  We don’t represent state employees.”

You don’t?  Why?

“Well, federal law, I mean … the paperwork is totally different.  We’d have to use new forms and everything.”

New forms?

“Yeah.  Whole different set of paperwork.”

Ok.  Your name was (redacted), was it?

“Yeppers.”

At that point I hung up.  The Pennsylvania Department of Labor & Industry won’t get involved because it’s a whole different set of forms.

I swear, sometimes it’s like I work for a bureaucracy.